Carte Blanche

uloo

Today…i want to free myself..

From thoughts of you.

From the shackles that binds me to you.

From all reverence i felt.

From the gravity that pulls me back to you.

From the memories, the hurt, the happy and the sad.

From the hope that we could still fix what was broken.

-eli-

 

 

I miss you but, I will be okay.

961610_10155503657510587_388212136_nI miss you, but not in the way that I need you or that I won’t be able to go on without you. There are so many attachments when telling someone that you miss them. There are so many different meaning to that phrase, or to that confession. So many different ways to how a person can perceive those words. I want to tell  you that I miss  you  but I don’t want it to seem as if I am hopeless without you.

Sometimes I wander off to places that remind me of you. I can see you standing beside me admiring the scenery in which we lost ourselves in. I can see us creating memories with the wind, with the sunset, with the feel of the day turning into night. Don’t think that I am not myself without you, or that I need you here at every moment to remember that it’s going to be okay. Just know that I miss you, and if I could I would take your voice over the silence any day. (Via:@poemporns)

wretched heart

image

Was it hard letting go of him? It was, and it wasn’t because I missed him, because who he is right now isn’t who I miss, I don’t know who he is anymore. But it was hard letting go because I had this person who had became a huge chunk of my life, a person who lit fires in the darkest parts of me, and then they had left me, the fires burned out and I now had a gaping hole in my heart, and that’s why it hurts to let go. It happens in stages really, I had found myself one day laughing at how pathetic I was for ever loving him, but the next day I was on the floor of my shower begging God to bring him back to me. I think if anyone’s every experienced heartbreak you know how hard it is to do things without that person. It’s entirely way to hard to move on, and it’s also hard to accept. It’s also hard to grasp the fact that the person you had grown to love is now a stranger to you. You don’t talk to them anymore, but you hear about them and your stomach clenches and I can promise you it won’t feel too great. I’m sorry to tell you this but you’ll probably always have a spot for them in your heart, the hole they made can be filled by them, and only them. I truthfully don’t think I’ll ever let go of him fully either. (via @poemsporn)